When I first saw the trailer for Knives Out in 2019 I thought it was a joke—I didn’t know Daniel Craig could play camp with such commitment. I enjoyed it hugely. The second film in the Knives Out series starring Craig’s detective Benoit Blanc, Glass Onion, started streaming on Netflix this December, and it’s even better. Writer and director Rian Johnson nails it from the beginning—the whole film is dripping with satire while being self-critical at the same time, and most importantly, it’s fun.
Glass Onion begins during lockdown. In an early scene Daniel Craig sits in the bath on a four-way zoom call with relatives, smoking a cigar and complaining that he’s going mad because he can’t use his brain. A bottle of liquor perches behind him and he wears a velvet smoking cap. The scene should be a satire but after 2020, we’ve all been there. In what other situation could so luxurious a pastime drive one mad? But that was lockdown.
Covid means Daniel Craig’s character Benoit Blanc has nothing to do except sit in the bath for six hours smoking cigars—the brilliant detective goes stir-crazy without a hard case to engage his mind. Thank goodness a hard case lands in his lap. Benoit Blanc is a mashup of famous literary detectives but with a southern drawl and a fabulous wardrobe. He has Poirot’s disregarding idiosyncrasy, plus Sherlock Holmes’s disarming charm. Recent film and television portrayals of Sherlock Holmes (such as Benedict Cumberbatch’s) have completely missed the famous detective’s charm. Holmes isn’t a rude asshole. He’s a Victorian gentleman, rude isn’t in his repertoire. Anyway, Benoit Blanc is more Holmes than Poirot, with a Queer Eye wardrobe.
Glass Onion starts off as a murder-mystery-game spoof: six friends meet on a billionaire friend’s private island, which is dominated by an architectural absurdity that he calls the Glass Onion. Edward Norton plays the bro-billionaire Miles Bron, a mashup of Mark Zuckerburg and zen wellness guru types. Norton wears an unbuttoned linen top and a punchable expression, and is clearly enjoying playing a punchable character. His island is chock-full of luxury tech and robot servants that are meant to impress but also control his guests. The stunning wraparound garden erupts in alarm bells while a voice shouts ‘please, keep our water clean’, when Daniel Craig lights a cigarette. A smoke-free island— the irony will become apparent by the end.
There’s also an unseen clock that dongs the hour, every hour, across the whole island. ‘DONG’: it’s just a voice saying ‘dong’. ‘I got Phil Glass to compose that,’ says bro-billionaire. The satire and jokes come thick and fast—visual and verbal. ‘How many staff does it take to run a place like this?’ asks Leslie Odom, Jr. ‘I wanted it to be just us,’ says bro-billionaire. ‘This isn’t some asshole mansion. It’s a commune for creativity,’ he says, as a robot creaks past carrying the guests’ bags.
Bro-billionaire spouts malapropisms, which is how Benoit Blanc sees through him so quickly. I’ve never seen a murder mystery game spoof where the game is spoiled right away. Spoilers, sorry. But not really because that happens in the first twenty minutes and there are almost two hours to go. I really had no idea where the film was going, but I knew I was in good hands. Rian Johnson’s cracking script is propelled by super performances—Kate Hudson is always funny but she made me laugh out loud playing the model/influencer type who’s been cancelled by the Twitter mob for comparing herself to Harriet Tubman. ‘In spirit,’ she says, rolling her eyes—obviously that makes it better. Dave Bautista, i.e. Drax from Guardians of the Galaxy, plays a beefy men’s-rights video blogger who disparages the ‘breastification of America’.
His girlfriend chimes in during his vlogs: ‘Hey feminists, I love my boobs, sorrrry.’ Her name is Whiskey and I loved her right away. We catch snippets of her conversations with other women later in the film and she’s obviously plotting a feminist political takeover. Although they seem transparent, there are layers to all the characters…almost like a glass onion. Janelle Monáe not only keeps up with this seasoned cast, but outstrips all except Daniel Craig in her range and her ability to play satire very straight. And she has a tougher job playing two characters, one of whom pretends to be the other. I won’t say more but her development during the film is a treat. Also her outfits.
Daniel Craig is clearly having the time of his life, ditching the James Bond trunks for a matching stripey two-piece swimming costume with a collar and neckerchief. His covid facemask is a spotted burgundy cravat, and why not? The film is bursting with colour and joy amid the satire and damning criticism of the super-rich. Kate Hudson’s shimmering peacock dress is probably an internet sensation already.
The film is also bursting with shocking cameos, some of whom make sense in the film’s world, and others who do not (was that Stephen Sondheim in the four-way zoom call?) And just wait till you see who opens the door in an apron, and then never appears in the film again. The Knives Out films have already gained enough admiration in Hollywood that they can get these famous people to just pop up and then fuck off. Cameos don’t always work but these ones add to the satire and surrealism.
The plot is a murder mystery, but not the kind you think. In the vein of Agatha Christie’s posh rich people who want to kill each other, Glass Onion depicts a group of friends who all turned a blind eye to get money and power, and what happens when someone threatens to expose their secret. Edward Norton is the kingpin, the one who made them all. Janelle Monáe is the one who stands up to him. But what can you do to a guy who has it all? Monáe’s solution is simple and destructive.
Having at first seemed helpless and a bit boring, Monae’s character becomes super-productive and brilliant when intoxicated, which is something we’d all like to think about ourselves. Edward Norton’s comeuppance befits a man whose sole life goal is to ‘be mentioned in the same breath as the Mona Lisa, forever’. Let’s just say he gets what he wished for.
Feature image credit: Netflix
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