Comic Lubna Kerr didn’t realise she was having a heart attack the first time it happened. Here she explains why it’s important to talk about the symptoms – particularly if you’re a woman.
My first heart attack happened on a Friday in 2016 and went totally unnoticed by everyone, including me. I was on my way to make my will when it happened, and I suddenly felt really unwell, but as it passed after a few minutes I just carried on with my day – I even went to a comedy club that evening. Ironically, the only thing I didn’t get done that day was writing my will (and it remains unwritten eight years later!).
But you can’t outrun your fate – or a cardiac arrest – and when I was at work on the following Monday it all caught up with me. Thankfully at that time I was working as a hospital pharmacist, so when I complained about feeling unwell and having agonising chest pains, my colleagues sat me down on an office chair and wheeled me to A&E. It was soon confirmed that I was in cardiac arrest, and I learned my first lesson – women often assume that the signs of cardiac arrest are gastrointestinal issues and, like me, just carry on with their day.
That’s because – as I was soon to discover – the cardiac arrest symptoms that we’re all told about in awareness campaigns, such as pain that spreads to the left arm, dizziness, nausea, and sweats aren’t necessarily the symptoms that women experience. As one of my jobs at the time was working with diabetics to help them prevent heart attacks, I was shocked to learn that we’re told about what happens to men, but not what women need to look out for. It’s a worrying lesson about how women’s health issues are often overlooked.
My unexpected day off and trip to A&E turned into a week-long hospital stay, which gave me plenty of time to think about not only what had happened, but what I wanted to do with my life. I had already been acting and performing comedy for a few years at this point – much to the horror of my children – and this was my cue to think about what I wanted to do with my life.
It’s a cliché to say that something like this makes you rethink things, but it really does. I began to realise that my real passion was writing and performing, and if I was going to do that, I needed to focus on it and really commit. As a result, I left the job in the hospital pharmacy, and have over the years gradually reduced my time working as a pharmacist; I now only work in healthcare for a few days a month. Instead, I spend a lot of my time writing, I’ve written several plays over the years, including the Tickbox trilogy, and have performed stand-up at clubs and festivals across the UK – and beyond.
My work focusses on my own experiences, for example, my most recent Edinburgh Fringe show as about trying to fit in at primary school after my family moved from Pakistan to Scotland. I think it’s important to share these stories and explore the issues surrounding them. I want to get my story out there and help others do the same, it’s a real driving force for me and I think that’s something that came out of being so ill and realising how things could have turned out for me.
One of the other things that my cardiac arrest inspired me to create is my new show, The C-Word, although it’s not the main focus of the show. Instead, I explore its impact on my life, alongside the other C-words that have shaped me. These include cricket (which connected me and my father), my conservative (with a small C) children, comedy, communication, even cheese and cake! I hope the show will not only entertain, but also help other women recognise the signs of cardiac arrest – it would be amazing to think the show could change – or maybe even help save – someone else’s life.
Lubna Kerr’s The C Word debuts at The Women in Comedy Festival on Saturday 12 October at Creatures Comedy Club, Manchester