Y’KNOW, I’ve never met a kid with coulrophobia.
That’s an intense and irrational fear of clowns and, while many hours of academic study have been dedicated to it, the only people I know who suffer from this phobia are otherwise rational adults when you think it would be the kiddywinkles fleeing from clowns.
I reckon the admittedly terrifying Pennywise, the antagonist of Stephen King’s It who looks like a demonic Ronald McDonald, is to blame and when I was a journo one of our sub-editors was so petrified of him she couldn’t work on the film page featuring his image.
But kids have no such fears and that’s why a visit to Circus: The Show should be (big) top – see what I did there? – of your list when planning a family day out at this year’s Edinburgh Fringe.
Circus: The Show is returning to the capital for the third year running after two sold-out previous runs, taking up its usual residence in the glorious Palais Du Variete Spiegeltent in Assembly George Square Gardens.
With Disney superstar Magnus Danger Magnus running the show as ringmaster, thrills, spills, laughter and gasps are guaranteed – and your own offspring could end up helping with the fun.
Don’t worry, they will be returned unharmed…
Circus The Show, 13.25, Assembly Palais de Variete, August 5 – 31
https://assemblyfestival.com/whats-on/circus-the-show
There’s a bit of a theme of people more familiar to grown-up audiences doing family-friendly shows this year, and one I will be front and centre for is Frankie Monroe: A Show For Babies.
Now, I saw Frankie – he of the Sudocrem-slathered face – do his demonic Northern club comic show last year and it was a five-star scream (literally) but here he is promising a show that is for babies, not a kids’ show, so if any kids come along they will have to pretend to be babies or hide so Frankie can’t see them.
I have genuinely no idea how this will work, or how he will avoid the attentions of the appropriate authorities, but I can’t wait to find out.
Frankie Monroe, A Show For Babies, 12, Monkey Barrel, August 24
https://www.edfringe.com/tickets/whats-on/frankie-monroe-a-show-for-babies
One show that is absolutely for babies is Bubbalicious, a sensory display of colour, sound, light and movement to spark joy and ignite wonder that incorporates puppets, bubbles (natch), clowning, shadow play and more.
Bubba-licious, various times, Laughing Horse @ Pear Tree, August 6 – 30
https://www.edfringe.com/tickets/whats-on/bubba-licious
Fringe veteran and children’s author Olaf Falafel is back after two sell-out runs with another bubbling vat of family-friendly fun and the title, Olaf Falafel’s Stupidest SUPER Stupid Show: This Time It’s Stupider! Says all you need to know about a man more often seen baffling adult audiences with his surreal schtick.
Olaf Falafel’s Stupidest Super Stupid Show This Time It’s Stupider, 11.30, The Ballroom @ Laughing Horse @ The Counting House,
Also bringing their children’s show back – for the first time in seven years – are the people behind Showstopper! The Musical who are offering Showstopper! The Kids Show which promises to be every bit as excellent as their Olivier-winning main show.
An interactive musical, you can see your kids’ ideas turned into marvellous, mischievous adventures from scratch in front of their very noses. However, grown-ups beware, they only take suggestions from the kids!
Showstopper! The Kids Show, 10.30, Grand @ Pleasance, August 9,15,16,22,23,29,30
https://www.pleasance.co.uk/event/showstopper-kids-show
And if your clown craving isn’t satisfied Darryl J. Carrington, who is also performing a late-night show, is presenting his Out Of The Box show.
A silent British clown, visual comedian and juggler Darryl, too, is making a triumphant return to the Fringe after winning Best Family Show at the Brighton Fringe last year.
This is a visual comedy spectacular with world-class tricks, uncontrolled laughter and the most ridiculous finale you will ever witness.
Packed with innate silliness, Darryl’s accessible, gentle, non-verbal style makes the show enjoyable no matter your grasp of English or indeed your age.
Adults have just as much fun and are in just as much danger of being invited to take part in the action.
Darryl J Carrington: Out of the Box, 13.20, Underbelly George Square
https://www.edfringe.com/tickets/whats-on/darryl-j-carrington-out-of-the-box
The aforementioned Magnus Danger Magnus is certainly making the most of his time in Edinburgh as he’d brought his Explosive Science Show! back for a second consecutive year after selling out performances across the world.
The maddest of mad scientists, Magnus give us a Science, Technology, Engineering and Maths (STEM) show that is greater than the sum of its parts and is a sure-fire kiddy-pleaser.
Explosions, high voltage, chemistry and chaos combine to make sure the weans will learn something in the school holidays – but they’ll be too busy laughing and hollering to notice!
10.00, Assembly George Square, August 6 – 31
https://assemblyfestival.com/whats-on/explosive-science-show
Mario The Maker Magician is another show that has a STEM bent. Expect robots, magic and slapstick as super Mario (hope that’s not trademarked) leads you through an explosion of energy and belly laughs.
Mario the Maker Magician, 11.00, Underbelly Bristo Square
https://underbellyedinburgh.co.uk/event/mario-the-maker-magician-1-1
If magic is more your kids’ thing than science – though I’m not sure of the difference, I mean, have you ever actually seen electricity? – then The Greatest Magic Show! will hit the mark.
One of the hottest tickets in town for the past five years, this show features Aussie comic magicians Sam Hume and Justin Williams in an hour that is anything but your typical children’s magic show.
Uniquely bonkers, Sam and Justin bring a touch of Las Vegas to George Square with circus stunts, mindbending magic and their own brand of slightly insane humour and all kids get a free magic wand on entry to conjure up their own dreams.
The Greatest Magic Show, 11.45, Assembly George Square
https://assemblyfestival.com/whats-on/the-greatest-magic-show
If you’ve been needing a bit of an opera/video game crossover in your life then wait no more as Madame Chandelier’s Grand Theft Opera is the show for you.
When Mme Chandelier’s daughter is sucked into her video game Tron-style by the evil Queen of the Night, she has to gather opera’s fiercest characters for an epic boss battle.
It sounds so mad it just has to be checked out.
Madame Chandelier’s Grand Theft Opera, 12.15, Pleasance Courtyard August 5 – 16
https://www.edfringe.com/tickets/whats-on/madame-chandelier-s-grand-theft-opera
Now, family trips are often late to start as you have to make sure everyone is ready but in The Listies: 110% Ready Matt and Rich attempt what no family has achieved before – leaving the house on time.
Rich has a plan but Matt has other ideas and you might just get a few time-keeping tips in among the slapstick, puns and – yes – a visit from the Snot Ness Monster.
The Listies, 13.00 Assembly George Square,
https://www.edfringe.com/tickets/whats-on/the-listies-110-ready
If Tolkien is a hit in your house, theatre company ETC are bringing a thrilling new adaptation of The Hobbit to the Edinburgh Festival Fringe. Promising an action-packed adventure with original music, comic invention and theatrical magic for audiences aged 8 to 108, this is a fast-paced, family-friendly journey.
Following a series of celebrated adaptations of classic novels and a growing reputation for inventive world-building, the company returns to Edinburgh with what is its most ambitious adventure yet.
This imaginative new production conjures Middle-earth live before the audience’s eyes through dynamic physical theatre, puppetry, ingenious staging and fast-moving ensemble storytelling.
The plan is to give some younger members their first look at Tolkien’s world and remind older audiences why they fell in love with orcs, elves, dwarfs and hobbits in the first place!
The Hobbit, 12.30, The Space@Niddry Street, August 10 – 15
Finally, for slightly older kids who like nothing better than a good scare, the Children’s Underground Ghost Show takes full advantage of Edinburgh’s status as the most-haunted city in Britain to put the wind up weans.
Who haunts the city’s famed vaults? Join Mingin’ Annie from Edinburgh’s pitiless past and explore what it’s like to be trapped beneath the city’s teeming streets for 400 years.
Children’s Underground Ghost Tour, various times, The Police Box on the Royal Mile
https://www.edfringe.com/tickets/whats-on/children-s-underground-ghost-show
